GrowingUpStory

fear

2012-02-01T18:43:00.002+02:00

I'm calling upon You
Who holds not only my breaths
But everything I do have
For I have nothing left
Except for what You let me to save

I'm calling upon You
Whose mercy never last
For I am nothing but everything that You allow me to grasp

I'm calling upon You
Who keeps my heart back and forth
For I feel nothing other than those You alloweth

So my Rabb
I am here for my fear from what I have done and will be doing
For I am a slave who has absolutely nothing
Other than the fear that You've been putting
Keep me in this state till the Day of Our Meeting.

A poem which made Imam Ahmad (ra) cry

2012-01-25T21:39:00.000+02:00

...

2012-01-02T23:08:00.004+02:00

Forgive me for not wetting my prostration with tears for so long
for have been abandoning You all along
for not coming to You when the night is long
for sometimes forgotten from where I do belong

Forgive me for I realized how much
I have nowhere to go as such
of Your arms to return and touch
for I am a slave with nothing much

For as much do I know that You'd love me to
raise my hand and complains to You
of whatever grief has life entitled me to
I always feel shame on everything I do
For my shame is that it's not worth what have been given by You

But still You said
Raise your hand O my slave, and ask from me, for I'll feel shame for letting you go without granting your need
so I raised my hand
and to only You do I put all my burden on my head

For You put the scares in our heart
for You put the calmness in it
for You are the only One who can Guide
for You know whatever we show and hide
for You keep our heart still and tide
for You are the only One who is able to persuade

Ya Rabb, make it easy for us, and give us and everyone involved, peace in the heart.

rehearsal

2011-12-29T00:53:00.001+02:00

first rehearsal to be a garment.
how difficult would that be?
Allahummansurni fi amri.

dear some

2011-11-19T02:41:00.001+02:00

Young married people, please show us some good examples so we the singles might find marriage worth considering.

Thank you.

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she who cant read

2011-11-17T02:18:00.003+02:00

how could she possibly write?

so what's new on the shelves?
pfft~

bersih:seksualiti merdeka:etc

2011-11-09T00:02:00.003+02:00

60. al-Mumtahanah: She Who is Tested

1) O ye who believe! Choose not My enemy and your enemy for allies. Do ye give them friendship when they disbelieve in that truth which hath come unto you, driving out the messenger and you because ye believe in Allah, your Lord ? If ye have come forth to strive in My way and seeking My good pleasure, (show them not friendship). Do ye show friendship unto them in secret, when I am Best Aware of what ye hide and what ye proclaim ? And whosoever doeth it among you, he verily hath strayed from the right way.

2 )If they have the upper hand of you, they will be your foes, and will stretch out their hands and their tongues toward you with evil (intent), and they long for you to disbelieve.

3) Your ties of kindred and your children will avail you naught upon the Day of Resurrection. He will part you. Allah is Seer of what ye do.

13) O ye who believe! Be not friendly with a folk with whom Allah is wroth, (a folk) who have despaired of the Hereafter as the disbelievers despair of those who are in the graves.

not that i've just came to this recently. its recently that i have the chance to write them here.

:) :) :)

2011-10-29T16:35:00.000+02:00

Taking hormones to stimulate milk production in the woman: Will she become a mother through breastfeeding thereby and will her husband become a father?

My friend and his wife have adopted two boys. She is medically unable to produce children. They understand that the only way these boys can stay with them pass the age of puberty is if she breastfed them before the age of 2 years. In order to satisfy this Islamic requirement, she had herself injected with Hormones that produced milk her body and she breastfed them. Does artificially injecting Hormones to produce milk and then breastfeeding them fulfill the condition in the light of Islam? Are those boys now Mahram to her?
This will help many other couples who are not adopting just becasue their wives do not have milk and can not breastfeed the adopted child hence the issue of Mahram and Non-Mahram will come after they grow up regardless of boy or girl.

Praise be to Allaah.

The majority of scholars think that the woman’s milk that has consequences does not necessarily have to result from intercourse with her husband (and resulting pregnancy) or from giving birth; rather if she takes something to stimulate milk production then breastfeeds a child with that, this infant will become her son through breastfeeding. Hence they did not rule it out if a woman who is a virgin who has never been married before breastfeeds a child; she becomes a mother through breastfeeding. This is the view of Maalik, ash-Shaafa‘i and Abu Haneefah, and was regarded as more correct by the Hanbali scholars al-Mardaawi and Ibn Qudaamah.

In order for him to become a son of the woman who breastfeeds him, it is stipulated that she should breastfeed him five times, and that should be when the child is two years old or younger.

Muhammad al-‘Utbi al-Maaliki (may Allah have mercy on him) said: And I heard him –i.e., Imam Maalik – when he was asked about a woman who takes herbs that stimulate milk production, then she breastfeeds with it: does this breastfeeding create the mahram relationship? He said: Yes, that creates the mahram relationship; is it not milk? He said: Yes. He [Imam Maalik] said: Then the mahram relationship is established by that.

Muhammad ibn Rushd al-Maaliki (may Allah have mercy on him) commented on that:

His comment -- that if the woman stimulates the production of milk by something that she takes then breastfeeds with that milk, then it is milk that creates the mahram relationship -- is like what is said in al-Mudawwanah: The milk of a virgin girl creates the mahram relationship; the milk of a woman creates the mahram relationship in all cases, based on the apparent meaning of the words of Allah (interpretation of the meaning): “Forbidden to you (for marriage) are: … your foster mother who gave you suck, your foster milk suckling sisters,” [an-Nisa’ 4:23]. It does not specifically mention a woman who has a husband to the exclusion of one who does not have a husband.

End quote from al-Bayaan wa’t-Tahseel by Ibn Rushd al-Maaliki, 5/153

Shaykh Muhammad ibn Saalih al-‘Uthaymeen (may Allah have mercy on him) said: The words “and one who is not pregnant” mean: if a woman breastfeeds a child without having been pregnant. This happens a great deal: if a child cries, a woman comes along who has no milk and is not married, and she gives him her breast in order to quieten him, and the sucking stimulates milk production. If he breastfeeds five times or more, does he become a son to her? The author said no, because that came about without there having been a pregnancy. But this reason is not sufficient to prove his point. The correct view, which is held by the three imams, is that it does create the mahram relationship; if the child breastfeeds from a woman five times, then he becomes a son to her, whether she was a virgin or beyond the age of childbearing or had a husband. The evidence that it established the mahram relationship is based on the text and rational evidence.

The textual evidence for that is the general meaning of the words of Allah (interpretation of the meaning): “Forbidden to you (for marriage) are: … your foster mother who gave you suck…” [an-Nisa’ 4:23]. And there is nothing in the Qur’aan or Sunnah to stipulate that the milk should be the result of pregnancy, so the general meaning of the text still stands.

The rational evidence is that the wisdom behind the milk establishing the mahram relationship is the nourishment of the child thereby. If the child is nourished by it, then the reason for it creating the mahram relationship has been established. With regard to the verse (interpretation of the meaning) “The mothers shall give suck to their children…” [al-Baqarah 2:233], what it refers to what the mother should do of completing the term of breastfeeding. So the correct view is that a woman’s milk creates the mahram relationship whether it is the result of pregnancy or otherwise. So the milk of a virgin creates the mahram relationship, and the milk of an old woman who has no husband and is past the age of childbearing creates the mahram relationship.

End quote from ash-Sharh al-Mumti‘ ‘ala Zaad al-Mustaqni‘, 13/440, 441

See also the answer to question no. 118709.

Based on that, if a woman takes medicine or eats beneficial foods that do not cause harm and that stimulate milk production, then she breastfeeds a child with it five times and the child is two years old or younger, then he becomes a son to her through breastfeeding and the breastfeeding establishes the mahram relationship which makes marriage haraam and makes it permissible to be alone together or to look at one another and to be a mahram in the case of travel. But it does not establish ties of lineage or obligations of maintenance, or rights of inheritance.

It should be noted that the husband of the woman who breastfeeds in this case will not become a father through breastfeeding, because the milk did not come from him, so it is permissible for his sons from a wife other than the one who is breastfeeding to marry the daughter who was breastfed by that wife and it is permissible for his daughters from a wife other than the one who is breastfeeding to marry the son who was breastfed by that wife.

In al-Fataawa al-Hindiyyah, by a group of Hanafi scholars (1/343) it says: A man married a woman who never bore him any children, then she produced milk and she breastfed a boy. The breastfeeding was from the woman without her husband being connected to it, so the children of this man from any other wife did not become mahrams to the boy. End quote.

In Mughni al-Muhtaaj by ash-Sharbeeni ash-Shaafa‘i (3/420) it says: If a virgin produces milk and she gets married and gets pregnant from her husband, the milk belongs to her and not to the husband so long as she has not given birth, and if she breastfeeds an infant, then her husband is not a father to that child. But if she gives birth to his child, the milk after she gives birth belongs to him. End quote.

The ruling will never differ concerning the husband of the breastfeeding woman with regard to practical shar‘i rulings having to do with looking or being alone with (the one who was breastfed). He is the husband of the mother of the breastfeeding child; if the one who is breastfed is female, then she becomes his stepdaughter and it is haraam for him to marry her and the same rulings apply to him as to a father through breastfeeding in this regard.

It should also be noted that the word “adoption” mentioned in the question is not used in the sense that is forbidden in Islam, which is when the child is attributed to someone other than his real father. Rather what is meant is taking care of an orphan and looking after him. Hence we prefer not using this word in this sense because of the confusion it may create

magic word,

2011-10-22T00:39:00.005+02:00

you know it.

أَفَمَنْ أَسَّسَ بُنْيَانَهُ عَلَىٰ تَقْوَىٰ مِنَ اللَّـهِ وَرِضْوَانٍ خَيْرٌ أَم مَّنْ أَسَّسَ بُنْيَانَهُ عَلَىٰ شَفَا جُرُفٍ هَارٍ فَانْهَارَ بِهِ فِي نَارِ جَهَنَّمَ ۗ وَاللَّـهُ لَا يَهْدِي الْقَوْمَ الظَّالِمِينَ ﴿١٠٩﴾ لَا يَزَالُ بُنْيَانُهُمُ الَّذِي بَنَوْا رِيبَةً فِي قُلُوبِهِمْ إِلَّا أَن تَقَطَّعَ قُلُوبُهُمْ ۗ وَاللَّـهُ عَلِيمٌ حَكِيمٌ

Then is one who laid the foundation of his building on righteousness [with fear] from Allah and [seeking] His approval better or one who laid the foundation of his building on the edge of a bank about to collapse, so it collapsed with him into the fire of Hell? And Allah does not guide the wrongdoing people. Their building which they built will not cease to be a [cause of] skepticism in their hearts until their hearts are stopped. And Allah is Knowing and Wise. (9:109-110)

till then, lets not talk.

of ustazah piilihan.

2011-09-21T10:43:00.003+02:00

didik wanita, terdidik generasi.

ustazah= professor (direct arabic translation)

i do not see any good reasons of this program really. we've got a few examples gained by previously Imam Muda. Did it ever increase your faith? Did you wake up more frequently at night after watching it? Did you read the Quran more? Did you watch more TVs after that?

I've seen and read some people responding saying this might be a chance for da'wah and all. But, to which extend do people really see this as a call towards Islam? If a man will ever understand this purpose, then he shouldn't be watching this program at all. Because, any knowledgable man should know that this program will bring further fitnah to him, make him raising his gaze towards women, and thus lowering his iman.

Malaysian needs a better explanation of their religion, not a group of people who claims themselves good enough, just because they appear more on tv. This religion, and this generation are pretty much desperate of a very authentic, and well-educated scholar, and not some group of people who read the Quran out loud, not even understanding the meaning, and win the hearts based on how good their voices are. And wallahi to have an Ustazah being born, truly it is not from a television program. The scholars spent their whole life learning this religion, and they never claimed themselves good enough, but only few weeks that is, then you can create an Ustazah? How silly!

It is true that you have to educate women, so you'll have the educated generation. But, look at what you are actually educating your women towards. Scholarity or Popularity. Devil's whisper is coated with intention is well. Allahu mustaan.

morals

2011-09-05T17:36:00.001+02:00

Lots have happened. Some small examples i have gain after these very few days at home:

Little things that you think is 'ok' before and on your way towards marriage do count. After few years of your marriage things might still be good. Later then you'll see kids screwing up, husbands cheating and fornicate. If you're getting married today, check it on what bases it is gonna be built on. Simple little things like not lowering your gaze, having boyfriends, khalwah on text messages, facebook, skype, going out for a date, tabarruj on your wedding day. Little things. Can't plant things in paradise with the seeds of hell.

I'm saying this towards myself. Mostly.

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ittaqillah.

2011-08-12T00:11:00.001+02:00

How big is the blessing you might actually have just by being able to feel the fear when you tell your own self : ittaqillah.

Alhamdulillah for that.

You might not be the first in your class
Or the one people look up to
Your words never matter
Your looks are deceiving
But wallahi those heart of yours who feels fear out of very small short word
Only Allah knows how much it is worth.

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enough.

2011-07-16T23:45:00.001+02:00

Mourning days are way over
Why haven't you start climbing again?
If the bottom stakes hurt so well
Why haven't the top ever fill your cravings?
So life thinks it is big enough so you're hit and burried underneath
Which rebellious gene have you lost that undertaker looks at you those undertakers look at you with those sarcastic eyes
And since when you actually feel comfortable living with those?

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sabar

2011-07-09T16:28:00.001+02:00

Kalaulah membina daulah islamiyah itu pekerjaan sehari dua, tanpa perlu melalui banyaknya kezaliman manusia, maka tidaklah banyaknya Allah mengarahkan Rasulullah s.a.w bersabar dalam al Quran. Adakah Rasul s.a.w bangkit bertunjuk perasaan, mendatangi rumah2 pembesar musyrik ketika puncak penyiksaan para sahabat dan ketika 3 tahun pemulauan Bani Hashim? Apa nasihat Rasul s.a.w pada keluarga Yasir, Bilal r.anhum?

فاصبر صبرا جميلا!

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reasoning.

2011-07-08T18:33:00.003+02:00

at my 20s, i realize i just have the religious knowledge equivalent to a 6 yrs old. and thus when i do something, i need someone to always guide me with reasoning to every yes and no. and like a 6 yrs old, those who reason best with more pleasant words will always win the obedient, rather than some emotional absurd words.

how much is the price of a future?

2011-06-27T16:43:00.003+02:00

will i get married? i don't know. will i have kids? yes.

for i have looked at my life and having lots of regrets. for the bad words i used to say, music i used to listen, quran i am dying to memorize at 20s, poor arabic, poor english, lacking of islamic knowledge. wallahi, my kids are not going through those same things.

'too much' line

2011-06-24T02:02:00.002+02:00

just because you 'plan' to get married, just because you are 'engaged', just because you have so much plan for the future, just because your parents never care, that doesn't mean there are no 'off limits'. you might plan to please Allah by a marriage, but beware of you achieving them by a displeasing way.

democracy is good because we were taught that way.

2011-05-29T23:14:00.004+02:00

and to make ourselves look good to our kids
we told them Prophet Muhammad s.a.w practices democracy
and we condemn sharia because we think we are more genius that the One who created us
questions are
if democracy ever is a good thing, why do we still have homeless in the democratic countries, why aren't crimes going down, why are new diseases keep contracting?
if sharia is a bad thing, have we all forgotten how there was never a man deserves taking zakaah at the time of Umar Abdul Aziz?

a quick note.

racism 2.

2011-05-18T22:05:00.003+02:00

pardon me for i was never proud being in this clan.

i live in the multiracial community. in fact my neighbors next doors, on the left is an indian family, while on the right is a chinese family. come and check. so when i was in the elementary school, i have classmates of multiracial. i remember when we were in the elementary school, classes were divided according to achievements. i can see from this point on, how many malays are stranded in the second class. i was in the first class, able to observe a pattern, in fact, way of thinking among these people. pre-pubertal, malay girls had already started flirting over, while the chinese develops another pattern of novel addiction, and the indians, i cant pretty much recall. this flirting pattern was up to a point rivalry was established.

when i grow a little up, before i entered boarding school i was stranded in the public high school for like two weeks or so. i have only 6 malay friends in my class, which is the first class. can you imagine, out of 40? and we all know when it comes to math, you'll realize how dumb you are, and all of these sudden you'll develop this kind of rush, "man, how can i ace this?" this is desperation. was.

and of course when you talk about results, you can pathetically count how much malays are there standing in the top 10. needless to mention, if the only best subject winner you can ever win is bahasa melayu and pendidikan islam. sad. very.

so i longed for boarding schools after that. and this feelings of desperation slowly disappeared. i felt so much in the comfort zone. i dont have anybody to beat, because most of the time i need lesser effort to beat people down. not as much as i did have. up to one point my mother asked, " what had happened to you? you used to love readings so much. yet you stop." i went from being able to read at the back of motorcycle, to rather sleep on every leisure hour. (this is not a blame i put on people for my sleeping habit, just to show how very comfortable it was)

i finished high school, and met again with some friends from childhood. some very excellent friends. non-malays. still excellent. those are days when i heard stories of how many of the excellent malay classmates of mine had finally not becoming as excellent as we predicted them to be. sad. very. again.

when it comes to college, because of malay status of being prioritized in everything, loads of these not so excellent friends of mine made it to the college. while these excellent no malays friends of mine, struggling to put on their college without financial support. but they ace. like always. so pardon me if i never like this idea of malays being prioritized. because sadly, the malays are just getting weaker and weaker and spoiled. and these spoiled people instead of all the opportunities they have on learning, they'd rather create some scandalous problems in the college. of course we all have known all these stuffs.

i saw these as oppression. no wonder why the idea of building an islamic country is always being rejected. because malays are always making the religion exclusive to their clan. looking at the non-muslims as if they are so disgusting, thus creating the thoughts that muslims are actually taught that way. and the behavioral and social problems created as if it was done by someone without religion at all. when i was told a malaysian christian's mother told her daughter, 'i can take it if you are converting to any religion, but islam', i can understand why. and when some political parties totally rejected sharia law, i can totally understand. ask a malay, do they even understand this law? how can you expect a foreigner to accept the law you cannot even explain of. how can you expect them to understand the virtues of zakah, while you yourself still see it as a burden? how can you expect them to know your God, when you yourself are so afraid of your kids confusion if they are using the same name in addressing their God?

all that we are all these days are watching political plays of sexual scandal, fighting against these showing off people who'd only gives off the money (they took from the taxes) when general elections are getting near, or to gain the public attentions. and we'd rather go on arguing, accusing, cursing as if those things are allowed in the religion. what is the point on working in the name of religion, if we lose all the ethics taught by the religion? and what is the point of working in the name of racism, if all we ever do is digging another hole in the sunken ship? sunken in comfort. that's what we are. sad, very.

people of bankruptcy.

2011-05-09T22:00:00.002+02:00

when the day comes
no one knows how much is enough
but a lot is needed for sure
how much is the price to water the thirst?
how much is the price to shelter from heat?
how much is the price to pass through the bridge?
how much is the price to get into the garden with rivers underneath?
and most expensive of all of these
how much is the price to look at the face of His?

when the day comes
all the days lent will be asked
every single seconds that lasted
really what have you done with your youth that it was left
rotten and wasted?
when you've gotten older and you thought you could be wise
what is wise when you look at your life and find only regrets that never passed
while your hair was black, your wrinkles was invisible, your muscles were strong, your brain were sharp, and your eyes were still bright
why wait till everything turns grey to start to pray?

when the days comes
where have the money and golds all gone?
and the kids that we are so proud of their beauty and crown
and the spouses we thought was caring and fond
and the friends we share cups of coffees and croissant
where were they when we turn to the mirror and see only frown?

when the day comes
what do we have as a trade
for a book on the right side to be handed
for all the expensive luxurious things we never could imagine anyone ever made
when the turn comes and our name was called
look at our hands we have only a penny or maybe less
for we wasted them too much on the world and all it was adorned with

when the day finally comes
try to look at joyful face you used to throw your laughs at
they dont say anything but from their eyes you can read
have you not got the payment of what you did?
and your gaze turning down with all the shame
isn't it better if death is the end?
for you sadly are taking your book from behind
for you are not only penniless more pathetic you even have debts haunting

when the day finally comes
is it not all that we want
after hard long sad path we undergone?
maybe ours are not hard enough or long enough or sad enough
because we never truly work to feel the pain strong enough.

Bayyinah Podcast's Dream Project-review

2011-04-27T23:52:00.003+02:00

i have only finished listening to tafseer of surah 'Abasa and Takwir. and i might say, just by finishing two series, this is awesome. or beyond. masha Allah. talk about in which place do you learn tafseer together with Arabic grammar, this is the place. i would give five stars to this.

get your copy here:

BAYYINAH PODCAST

of hijab and niqab.

2011-04-11T15:27:00.003+02:00

respond to niqab ban in france, and malaysian yati kaprawi.

talk about a better world. go on searching on google, rape rate all over the world. and talk about how many amongst them are the children. and to our surprise, these statistics show for about 40% of the cases, was done by acquaintances and friends. so, we shall question: why is this happening? where do these monsters came from? so who are there to blame?

these males, whose obligation against them are to lower their gaze, happened to be failing at doing so. and this shall lead to another question, what actually makes lowering gaze, a very hard thing to be done? my answer to that is: the failure of women, to actually learn her religion.

walk around the streets, on the billboard, on the pavement, basically in all places, there will be some women dressing half naked. eventhough not all of them, but they are there. all the time. go home, turn on the tv, almost every commercials are manipulating women for the attraction of these males' eyes. so how many times a day should a man seek for forgiveness from Allah, for all these things that actually is happening?

so what is the relation with hijab and niqab? where is it? you see, Allah didn't make a rule upon His creation for nothing. He creates you and therefore He knows you best. Allah knows the desires of these males to look at the women. that's why he ordered us all to cover ourselves. did he not mention it in quran? He did.

24:31
33:59
33:53

Did Prophet pbuh not mention it in ahadeeth? He did.

It was narrated from Safiyyah bint Shaybah that ‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her) used to say: When these words were revealed – “and to draw their veils all over Juyoobihinna (i.e. their bodies, faces, necks and bosoms)” – they took their izaars (a kind of garment) and tore them from the edges and covered their faces with them.
It was narrated from ‘Aa’ishah that the wives of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to go out at night to al-Manaasi’ (well known places in the direction of al-Baqee’) to relieve themselves and ‘Umar used to say to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), “Let your wives be veiled.” But the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) did not do that. Then one night Sawdah bint Zam’ah, the wife of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), went out at ‘Isha’ time and she was a tall woman. ‘Umar called out to her: “We have recognized you, O Sawdah!” hoping that hijab would be revealed, then Allaah revealed the verse of hijab.

i know some people say, it is not either full covering or dressing like a whore, there is in between. and i shall respond to that, not all man get seduced by the people in between, but again, not all men go on raping women. because Allah knows, inside the community, there is going to be these monsters who goes on raping people. if they seek for those wearing like whores, then please explain, how come the kids and even some menopausal elderly get raped? imagine living a life as mentioned by Allah, all the women are covering themselves CORRECTLY, altogether with complete understanding of why they are covering, and thus making the job of lowering gaze much easier, do we even have a chance to get to know the word rapist? what happened in the world today is these guys get turned on by those women in the porn, billboard, music videos, but not being able to get rid of their desires. and they started to seek for the weak women around, and those are the kids and the elderly. again, people might say, not all men having problems in controlling their desires, but again not all men go on raping women, and not all men having hypergonadism. Allah knows that in between His creation, there will be these group of men. so He creates the defend mechanisms. so that if one line fails, there'll back ups. if the males fail at lowering gaze, the women still works at covering themselves.

so in which way is this called an oppression? hijab and niqab are actually a way of uplifting the status of the women. the reason of the accusation of this oppression is actually the lacking of knowledge experienced by both parties, and how easy we are at buying the propaganda set by the non-believers.

talk about imprisonment, disappearance from the world, and enslavement. does this piece of cloth restricting from working and socializing? does this piece of cloth suddenly makes you so invisible that because of that you are not going to be heard and treated well? wallahi, the only imprisonment is walking around the street and every eyes are on you, and the only time the disappearance is felt when words are not heard just because people are too busy analyzing your body measurement, and the only enslavement i can ever think of is those women being manipulated everyday in every part in the media, like why do you need two half naked women in a picture of an F1 winner? wallahi fear Allah for every words you say, for He creates your flesh and He knows how to destroy them with the most intense pain.

p/s: be thankful if you are already wearing niqab. there are some women dying hard to wear them, but not being able to do so.

boarding pass

2011-04-09T07:11:00.000+02:00

is not enough.

love

2011-03-02T19:42:00.005+02:00

that's love when it strikes
you don't bother lifting your eyes
because all that happen is your heart melting like the ices
to the very uplifting words and its graces

that's love when it strikes
that all that rings throughout the days in your ears
is the sound from a face whom familiarity is very less alike
but you know it is real because none are much alike

that's love when it strikes
when you heard the words and your faith spikes
like hydration after long and dry murdering thirst

that's love when it strikes
you don't bother lifting your eyes
because all that happen is your heart melting like the ices
not to the faces and all their graces
but to the words that keep you suffice

that's love when it strikes
you don't bother lifting your eyes
because they don't worth the prices
of eternity and all that it have to rejoice

that's love when it strikes
funny how you recognize the voice
of an unrecognizable face
and believing whatever it is that He says
and all the orders and rules that He sets

that's love when it strikes
where every words when it plays
fulfill your crave during the whines
as much entertaining on your joyous days

that's love when it strikes
look around and rejoice
when it comes to the turn for you to see His face
surely are the moment that can never be replaced.

propaganda

2011-02-03T01:27:00.002+02:00

those people who labeled you as terrorist
because of the faith you keep
is now there telling you
that your downfall is indeed a terrorism plan
and you suddenly stand next to them
forgiving all their mischievous accusations on you
just because you sadly think
two enemies make good friends
little that you know
you are just an old puppet
they just happen to love laughing at.

wishlist

2011-01-18T21:03:00.003+02:00

the day when i find the furthest are actually closest to my heart
the day when acquaintances are actually complete strangers
the day i recognize my vein
and The One closer than that

oh really
God forgive me
for i have not only sinned
but even worse i had them almost pinned

oh shall You clothe me when no one can
or shall You shadow me from your hot burning sun
or shall You remember me even when i whine
or shall You look at me when i am completely blind
and all the things i probably never mind
shall You?

my fear
is that You will never even recognize me
considering how little do i work to recognize You
and my fear today
hopefully will be helpful to overcome another fear
when I've got to see you later.

There is no saheeh hadeeth about Salaat al-Tasbeeh

2011-01-18T20:26:00.001+02:00

Brother I wanted to know the status and ruling on "Salat-ul-Tasbih" which is explained as is very important and referenced is given from Abu’Dawood & Tirimzi but without the Hadith number and it says "Our Beloved Prophet Muhammed (Sallallaho Alihiwassallam) said to his uncle (father’s brother) Sayyiduna Abbass (may Allah be pleased with him) Oh uncle shall I not give you Shall I not grant you Shall I not award you Shall I not do mercy on you When you do 10 things Allah will forgive your sins: of the future and of the past; new and old; those you have forgotten and those you did knowingly; big and small; hidden and revealed. Then he (Sallallaho Alihiwassallam) explained the taught the way to pray Salatul Tasbih and then said if you can pray this salah once a day, if you can not pray once a day then every Friday, and even if this is not possible then once a month and even if this is not possible then once a year and even if this is not possible then at least once in a lifetime (Abu’Dawood & Tirimzi) and it said that this phrase “Subhaan Allahi Wal Hamdulillahi Wa Laa ilaha illal Laahu Wallahu Akbar " should be recited in different steps in Sal’ah to make it to a count of 300. What is the ruling on this and is this from an authentic source.

Praise be to Allaah.

The scholars (may Allah have mercy on them) differed as to whether Salaat al-Tasbeeh is prescribed in Islam. The reason for this difference of opinion concerning it is the difference of opinion concerning the soundness of the hadeeth which speaks of it. The prominent scholars are of the view that it is da‘eef (weak).

1. Ibn Qudaamah (may Allah have mercy on him) said in al-Mughni (1/438):

With regard to Salaat al-Tasbeeh, Ahmad said: I do not like it. It was said to him: Why? He said: There is nothing saheeh about it, and he waved his hand as if dismissing it. End quote.

2. al-Nawawi (may Allah have mercy on him) said in al-Majmoo‘ Sharh al-Muhadhdhab (3/547-548):

al-Qaadi Husayn, and the authors of al-Tahdheeb and al-Tatimmah said: Salaat al-Tasbeeh is mustahabb, because of the hadeeth narrated concerning it. But this view of it as mustahabb is subject to further discussion, because the hadeeth in question is da‘eef (weak), and it involves changing the regular format of the prayer, so it should not be done without a hadeeth (to support it). Al-Tirmidhi said: More than one hadeeth was narrated from the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) concerning Salaat al-Tasbeeh, but not many of them are saheeh. And al-‘Aqeeli said: There is no proven hadeeth about Salaat al-Tasbeeh. End quote.

3. Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allah have mercy on him) said in Majmoo‘ al-Fataawa (11/579):

The best of the reports narrated about these prayers is the hadeeth about Salaat al-Tasbeeh, which was narrated by Abu Dawood and al-Tirmidhi, but nevertheless none of the four imams spoke of it; in fact, Ahmad regarded the hadeeth as da‘eef, and these prayers are not mustahabb.

4. Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allah have mercy on him) said in Majmoo‘ Fataawa Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (14/327):

What seems more likely to be correct in my opinion is that Salaat al-Tasbeeh is not sunnah, and that the hadeeth about it is da‘eef. This is for several reasons:

(i) The basic principle concerning acts of worship is that they are disallowed unless there is proven evidence that they are prescribed.

(ii) The hadeeth is mudtarib (weak); there is a difference of opinion concerning it for several reasons.

(iii) None of the imams regarded it as mustahabb.

(iv) If this prayer was prescribed, the ummah would have narrated a report concerning which there was no doubt and it would have been well known among them because of its great benefit. Moreover, it is not like any other act of worship, because there is no act of worship in which so much choice is given that it may be done once every day, or once in a week, or once in a month, or once in a year, or once in a lifetime. Because the weak hadeeth states that it is of great benefit and because it is not like any other act of worship, yet it is not well known and was not transmitted, we know that there is no basis for it, because if an act of worship is different from other acts of worship, and if it were of great benefit, people would pay attention to it and transmit it, and it would be popular and well known. Because that is not the case with regard to this prayer, we know that it is not prescribed. Hence none of the imams regarded it as mustahabb, as Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allah have mercy on him) said. Among the naafil acts which are proven to be prescribed in Islam there is a great deal of goodness and barakah for the one who wants more, so he should be content with that which is proven, and he has no need of that which is the subject of differences of opinion and doubts. End quote.

For more information, please see the answer to question no. 14320

And Allah knows best.

http://islamqa.com/en/ref/145112

engagement 2

2010-12-29T20:27:00.004+02:00

i am just too bad at hiding feelings. pffft~

of languages

2010-12-20T06:27:00.002+02:00

i was once wanting to become a translator.

just so you know this is not a scientific fact, but it works for me. i was not that good in english, apparently not having much of helps on practicing them back in malaysia. so as far as i can remember, i really started improving my english, mostly while listening to songs. which explains my pathetic addiction towards music, i hardly get rid of.

so i think now that people can talk in english so fluently, lets consider another more important language, which is Arabic, which is very famous with the phrase of the most difficult language in the world. so i find a very close relationship of understanding and mastering languages by song. but, since hardly we can find arabic song, sang in a complete perfect, fulfilling every aspect of Arabic grammar, we definitely have no other choices other than the Quran. i used to listen to songs again and again, finding lyrics from the internet, find the meaning of strange words.

so why not instead of listening to song and mastering them, listen to the Quran. again and again. while searching for the lyrics. read together. find strange words, seek meaning. one day, insya Allah, we will be able finally to understand EVERY eingle words in the duaas and reasons of why Shaykh Hateem was crying in the nights of Ramadhan.

today is not too late to get started.

definitely you dont have to be in egypt to master Arabic. but its a shame when you are already here, but you hardly understand the formal Arabic. you and I.

my wild imagination

2010-12-17T19:47:00.002+02:00

every time the door bells
what if it is Izrail inviting me home
and what was i doing before answering the door?

for those

2010-12-12T17:09:00.001+02:00

who love someone to death, and don't know why.

racism.

2010-12-02T21:03:00.003+02:00

i am not that interested in politics. and obviously i am one of a bumis. but seriously, do we really think this is a civilized way to entertain a citizen? this is not racist. it is even more than that. malaysia on its way to become a developed country, still having this apartheid system working REAL WELL. what a shame. not to mention all the beuraucracy, and politicians are just earning votes to live well, instead of making life well. seriously? i would love to see someday our film industry really go far, perhaps Hong Kong and Indians movie cannot even cross to our border because they don't even match our quality, instead of reading the corrupted industry, with all they have are few malays making popularity out of selling their personal life. in the end, yeah, perhaps that's a dream, perhaps will never come true.

collision

2010-11-27T12:39:00.002+02:00

this journey of life

we collide because we walk in the exact opposite direction

so let's not look at each other's face

and simply walk away.

000

2010-11-22T16:39:00.000+02:00

a gfit.

2010-11-20T21:37:00.001+02:00

do i even have one?

you know

2010-11-12T19:18:00.003+02:00

you can search religious issues, questions and answers on google too.
rather than spending the whole long day watching facebook news feed.
if you ever wonder.

p/s: li'an : a husband refuse to admit that the child his wife is carrying is his. and li'an gives a woman the permanent divorce. noun: anak li'an, adj : sumpah li'an.

choice.

2010-11-08T20:10:00.004+02:00

taken from here.

marrying a wrong man, is like purposely entering the valley of death.
no doubt.

my fave: kalau sebelum kahwin pun dah macam itu, cancel lah!

brain plasticity.

2010-10-30T01:02:00.003+02:00

not that brain turned plastic.

plasticity: changes @ growing.

thankfully got this topic for my last assignment (which took me to skip one evening lecture to finish, just to have another disappointment that the doctor doesn't show up the following day thus made me skip another lecture). so, what is so special of this brain plasticity?

we were born not knowing anything, nonetheless having any particular special talent. we own not to any languages (which explains why we only cry to get something, or get rid of them). later on, we learned one by one of those changes, and started become a natural in something. and these processes, however varies from person to person. let's say, i am good at language, having a friend good at maths, another good at painting, etc. so what makes these things varies?

ok, of course i have spoiled the answer. it's brain plasticity.

do you know that some people are having larger hippocampus, or inferior parietal, or occipital, or temporal, or cingulate gyrus than anybody else? this is true. in a blind man, whose occipital gyrus will be atrophied, this function is carried on by the temporal gyrus, and thus giving them better hearing. as to the motor function, a pro musician, who practices at least one hour a day will have inferior parietal larger than non musician, or amateur musician. these are researches made upon people. you can google more of them.

this, actually prove that human can really be programmed. even the autistic kids can be brought into normal. even the down syndrome kids, can catch up the learning. but what matters is time, and willingness of people to keep teaching.

there are studies of critical age for the plasticity to occur. actually it started since 2-3 months of age, get optimized at 6-12 months of age, maintained the level till 4 years of age, and started declining until 16-18 years.

speaking of which, it reminds me well that the Prophet p.b.u.h used to take 13 years to build a strong akeedah inside the Moslems. I believe this golden 13 years, should be seized. otherwise, it would be rather hard for people to actually obtain and keep those memories and eagerness for such knowledge.

i think this is more to parenthood now.

and, if any insults happens to the brain, even after this critical period, e.g: trauma causing paraplegia, the brain should compensate the damage (of course with slower course, if it happens after the critical period) by making hypertrophy to the remaining functional part, and thus making the paraplegic able to become normal again. but again, this needs lots of effort, and support from the surroundings and the subject themselves. this applies also to the memories you want to completely forget. not by trying hard to forget, but just do not touch them at all.

i think i love brain now, somehow. :)

p/s: and btw, in the end of the presentation, i feel satisfied with both the doctor and assignments. hehe.

...

2010-10-13T03:46:00.004+02:00

WH question.

2010-10-10T22:40:00.004+02:00

now is the perhaps most productive period of a human
but please, can everybody talk a little less about marriage?
seriously i am nowhere near interested.

watching everyone getting married
makes me a little disappointed with the married life, secretly
and hence perhaps killing all the desire
i don't know why
just stop asking when and who
i don't even care not having any.

the fact

2010-10-04T20:40:00.003+02:00

that i cannot start to love anything too much
because i am so afraid that i cannot handle the losing part.
:(

i miss you, you know.

this is very cancerous.

2010-09-27T12:04:00.002+03:00

Single, Muslim and Pregnant

By Alveena Salim

As an East London girl, it wasn’t unusual to see crowds of Muslim guys standing outside libraries waiting to try it on with any girl that passed through the door. Nor was it unusual to see groups of Muslim guys standing on top of street corners making comments at girls that walked past.

It definitely wasn’t unusual to see a guy drive round the same block at least four times just to take another look at a girl. Guys chased the girls. The girls played hard to get. But a couple of years down the line, I don’t see that any more. Why? Coz guys don’t need to chase girls any more.

Over the years, a lot more girls don’t see a problem with sleeping around. In recent years, we’ve seen the rise in Vicky Pollard and “Am I bovvered” wannabe Muslim ladettes, a rise in the number of youth who are ‘doing it’ and a rise in Muslim teenage pregnancies.

Fortunately, whilst the UK does have the highest number of teenage pregnancies in Europe, Muslim girls are least likely to get pregnant out of wedlock compared to all other faiths (1). However, Muslim teenage pregnancies DO happen and are often kept undercover.

What’s The Big Deal?

Premarital or extramarital sex - known as Zina is a major sin in Islam! Allah (swt) warns Muslims not to even come near it and describes it as

“an abomination and an evil way.” (17: 32)

According to a Hadith it is also considered one of the worst sins in the eyes of Allah (swt).

The Holy Prophet related a dream in which he saw a number of sinners were being punished. The Prophet said:

“…We proceeded until we came across a hole in the ground that resembled a baking pit, narrow at the top and wide at the bottom. Babbling and voices were issuing from it. We looked in and saw naked men and women. Underneath the pit was a raging fire; whenever it flared up, the men and women screamed and rose with it until they almost fell out of the pit. As it subsided, they returned (to the bottom). I said: ‘Who are these?’ They said: ‘…The naked men and women who were in the pit, they are men and women who indulge in Zina…” (Bukhari)

It is such a serious offence that all things that lead to Zina, such as being alone with a member of the opposite sex who you’re not related to is also forbidden in Islam.

The reason why it’s forbidden in Islam is coz of the major problems that it can bring into society such as illegitimate children, spread of disease, increase in divorce rate, spread of crime, children not being brought up or cared for properly and ultimately the breakdown of the family unit.

As a Muslim, to be pregnant and unmarried is the worst situation to be in. Such girls are often shunned by society, talked about in a bad way and are considered to have brought ‘shame’ on their family. This is why many teenage Muslim girls, who find themselves in such a serious situation, will go to great lengths to hide their pregnancy – and this may result in secret abortions or even a ‘virginity fix’.

24 hymen replacement operations took place between 2005 and 2006. An increasing number of women are paying up to £4,000 in private clinics for the procedure apparently under pressure from future spouses or in-laws who believe they should be virgins on their wedding night. Doctors said most patients are immigrants or British of ethnic origin. Dr Magdy Hend, consultant gynaecologist at the Regency Clinic, Harley Street, London, who started hymen reconstruction more than 18 years ago in the Middle East and the Gulf, said:

"In some cultures they like to see that the women will bleed on the wedding night. If the wife or bride is not a virgin, it is a big shame on the family."

Dr Hend also said that most clients are in their teens or early twenties and that demand is increasing, particularly from UK residents (2).

It is extremely important to note it is a myth that a bride will definitely bleed on her wedding night if she is indeed a virgin. Bleeding isn’t at all a reliable indication of a girl’s virginity, as many girls who are virgins do not bleed when they first have sexual intercourse and this is normal. To combat such ignorance amongst our people we need to educate ourselves about Islam so that we recognise true Islamic teachings from the backward cultural practices of today.

Some girls are forced to undergo secret abortions. Shanaz speaks of her experience:

The doctor asked me ‘why do you want an abortion?’ I told him it was because of my background and family and that there was no way I could have a baby. As an unmarried Muslim girl, I simply couldn’t go through with the pregnancy. Not only would it break up the family but I could be disowned, in fact anything could happen to me.

I also told him I was at college, and living at home with only a small grant. Throughout this time my then boyfriend was like a stranger.

I really needed his support but got none. He didn’t come to the private clinic with me, or help me with transport to the nursing home where they performed the operation. He just gave me half the money and that was that.

I had no-one to confide in really. The worst thing was coming home and being with my parents, knowing that something was living inside me. It was worse at night, when I had time to think clearly and hurt and feel guilty about what was going to happen. I was about to kill my child. It was terrible to feel like that and keep it all to myself. (3)

Abortion – The Easy Way Out?

So you’re knocked up, not married and scared of how you’re parents will react? Abortion seems like the easy way out. However, whilst many feminists may bang on about a woman having full control over their bodies, Islam does not see abortion as an answer to your problems.

Life is a gift from Allah (swt). No one has the right to take away or stop the life of anyone else. Killing any person is strongly condemned in the Quran, especially the killing of children which is specifically condemned in several chapters.

The Quran says:

"Kill not your children for fear of want; it is We who provide sustenance for them as well as for you; for verily killing them is a great sin. (17: 31).

Sex outside marriage can also result in serious consequences for all involved. In some instances some Muslim girls are killed for getting themselves in such a shameful situation, in so-called ‘honour killings’ which have nothing whatsoever to do with Islam.

So Why Do Unmarried Muslim Girls Have Sex?

“Coz there’s no point going out with a guy if you’re not going to do stuff” claims Anisha. Safa argues that “everyone is ‘doing it’ and anyone who denies it is a liar”. So peer pressure and the current norms of society play a huge part. Another common reason is lack of self-esteem, some girls go all the way because it makes them feel loved, desired and better about themselves. In other instances, it may be due to lack of appreciation or love at home, which makes them go looking for it elsewhere. Detachment from home can lead to attachment elsewhere.

On top of that, there’s the mixed message that teenagers learn in school. In a bid to decrease the number of teenage pregnancies, one government initiative was to give out free condoms, which gave the message “it’s OK to do it, as long as you use protection”. Whilst Western society tries to decrease the number of teenage pregnancies by dishing out free contraception, Islam emphasises no sex outside marriage. Islam gives that as a solution rather than a temporary cure.

The media also gives out messages that encourage teenagers to have sex before marriage; Sex is a topic that advertisers and marketers use very effectively to sell their products, from chocolates to mobile phones to even the latest car.

How many times has the storyline of teenage pregnancies hit popular soaps? ‘The new female imperative is that it is only through promiscuity and sexual aggression that girls can achieve admiration and recognition’.

Films such as Cruel Intentions and Mean Girls, the music and videos of Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera and Lil' Kim all help portray this message. ‘Girls are being led to believe they're in control when it comes to sexual relationships.’ (4)

Lack of Islamic education is another reason why young girls have sex outside marriage. How many parents give their children the Islamic ‘sex talk’? How may Mosque Imams address this issue?

So What Do You Want Me To Do About It?

Firstly, we need to acknowledge the fact that is an issue that affects the Muslim youth. Secondly, we need to be prepared to talk about it in order to educate our youth with Islamic knowledge. Parents should know that sex is not always a dirty word. It is an important aspect of our life.

There should be no shame or holding back in discussing this issue, if a child has reached puberty, it’s time to teach him/her the difference between right and wrong. And because the Western society is most definitely going to be tackling this issue in schools and through the media, we need to make sure more so, that our youth are educated about sex according to the teachings of Islam.

The people from the time of the Prophet asked questions about discharge and even wet dreams, in fact the Prophet praised the women of Ansar, because their shyness did not prevent them from seeking knowledge.

The main reason Muslim parents do not or cannot discuss sex education with their children is because of their cultural upbringing. Parents may not be comfortable with their own sexuality or its expression coz of the way they were brought up.

Our Imams/Mosques also need to educate the community and offer counselling to those people who may have fallen into this predicament. That way, young girls would not be forced to have undercover abortions, run away from home, contemplate getting ‘virginity fix’ surgery or be victims of ‘honour crime’.

And girls wake up. Most guys can walk away from a sexual encounter without giving it a second thought. Girls can’t do that. Don’t sleep with a guy in order to win his love, or to be accepted by your friends or even if you’re convinced that you’re ‘in love’.

The truth is that most guys have little respect for a girl who has slept with someone before marriage, even if you sleep with them! Plus, society thinks very low of such people and there’s a possibility that you may fall pregnant.

More importantly, you’ll be guilty of one of the biggest sins in Islam! If you have any self-respect, you’ll hold out for the guy who respects you enough to commit to marriage. Someone who can see themselves spending a bit more than a few nights with you.

taken from here.

burnt 'Quran'

2010-09-21T18:59:00.003+03:00

pardon my humble and sluggish opinion.

This is kinda off-style issue. Yeah i know. Despite my long holiday, i wonder why I find myself rather reluctant to touch this keyboard. So what do you say people? How do you feel? Or perhaps nothing at all?

Firstly let me introduce what is Quran. Quran is the words of Allah. Words are heard, read, and muttered, and to a more superior extent, memorized, followed, and obeyed. Mushaf, on the other hand, is a book, in which written by people's hand what is coming from Allah, which is the Quran. So, if you ever doubt what is circulating in the market, it is a Mushaf.

Let’s return to the burning Quran's issue. In my opinion, Mushafs are papers. They are so free to be burnt, literally. It doesn't matter. Talk to me about people burning the sacred 'thing', i have better point. Non-Muslims literally burnt the 'Quran'. And people get mad, start talking like they have been really into Quran since the beginning and working hard ever to protect it. But what i see is that Quran has been virtually burnt since perhaps decades by the Muslims ourselves. Well, perhaps not all of us. And no one ever gets mad. It has been burned out of the brains, hearts, garments, tongues, eyes, and in numbers of things you name it, they are all of it. And no one sees that as a humiliation. Worse, it is well ignored.

I do not support the burning Mushafs campaign. But i do not support the burning Quran thing more. you know, it is totally useless to have a very neatly handled Mushafs, kept untouched by a person who never ever get a chance to know what is written inside it, which is the Quran. It is bad to badly handle a Mushaf. But it is worse to badly handle a Quran, till in the end, it never reaches anybody's heart.

Zaid bin Arqam narrated that Muhammed said:
"Indeed, I am leaving among you, that which if you hold fast to them, you shall not be misguided after me. One of then is greater than the other: (First is) The book of Allah is a rope extended from the sky to the earth, and (the second is) my family, the people of my house (ahlul bait), and they shall not split until they meet me at the hawd, so look at how you deal with them after me." (Sahih).

Sunan Thirmidi, Volume 6, Chapter 31, Hadith No. 3788

تقبل الله منا و منكم

2010-09-09T06:06:00.000+02:00

It was narrated that Jubayr ibn Nufayr said: When the companions of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) met one another on the day of Eid, they would say to one another, “May Allaah accept (good deeds) from us and from you.”
Ibn Hajar said, its isnaad is hasan.

malaysia: a deeply developed country with very shallow people.

2010-08-31T01:52:00.005+02:00

i had an aunt, who was my mother's cousin, of my age, died yesterday, of breast cancer. so we returned to my late grandmother's village. from my observations and hearing:

people are paid to pray for the deceased (solat jenazah)
people talk about what was there during the bath of the deceased
people keep blaming why they agreed the osteotomy (on her vertebrae, 3 days before he died, to save the cord from making her paralysed)
i heard once: penat je membesarkannya.
people do not actually listen to another people advice that it is VERY HARAM for the decease's family to provide food for the guests.
let's not speak of tahleel. (may Allah grant them all his guidance.in fact us all)
a lot more words on what useless things science and doctors are.

this aunt of mine, had a late stage cancer in which from only inspection, i can observe about 8 x 8 cm swelling, they said she had hematuria, lower limb paralysis (which has desolved by osteotomy), and i believe it has gone to the liver, and she actually was dead because of the anaesthetic effect. she had undergone 4 radiation, which left another two before she can actually perform mastectomy. but she died before that.

but from this visit, i can see how shallow, perhaps, the majority of the malaysians. breast cancer USUALLY are painless, until they become real late, except for the inflammatory cancer which is quite rare. so if you have pain on the breast and armpit, most probably it is inflammation. not all swellings of the breast are cancer, but it has to be suspected until proven otherwise. small painless swelling, if discovered early, promise better chance for complete cure and longer life span. do not take changes in the body lightly. you may be young, married, and have lots of children but RARE cases may occur.

these are very basic things of breast cancer. care to educate the crowd? and education is a bidirectional effort. people may be eager to teach, but what if only very few care to listen? because again, they believe doctors can do nothing. bomohs worth more.

p/s: i have decided to open this blog again, as i think the main purpose of it is to benefit people. if any.

doings in Ramadhan.

2010-08-25T13:12:00.004+02:00

so yesterday, i went to taraweeh with my mother. and there was some lectures about dhikr to be done in Ramadhan. i do not remember exactly how it sounds like. But it was like some combination of few dhikr. and the ustaz said, this dhikr is to be attempted along the day, except during before breaking the fast at time which is prayer is best answered.

so, i have been thinking like, seriously i never heard of this. and the ustaz never mention any hadith or evidence that it is used to be done by either of the salafs. and he keep insisting to make everyone of the crowd to memorize this dhikr.

i am not trying to accuse him for teaching people bid'ah, even when part of myself thought of that. but, i think there are much better things to educate people to. which are very well known things, but not very widely done among malaysians.

leaving televisions and all its contents and strive to focus on ibadah.
reading quran as much as possible. it is a very well known deed among salafs. read here.
waking up for sahoor. and continue after sahoor to perform tahajjud.
in a hadith, one of the companions asked, how long is the distance between both? Rasulullah answered: 50 verses. (i'll update this hadith later)
pray as early as possible
asking for forgiveness.
seek for lailatul-qadr.

malaysians need to be exposed to what a shame it is to just waste the blessings on this month, rather than keeping people busy with Eid, and filling out the stomach. this is the reality.

read more about ramadhan here.

p/s: i remembered last year an ustaz told the same crowd, if the youths are not exposed to tahleel, and clinging around with the public, what are they going to happen? so after all that had happened, i want to say, all of these while after allowing the youth to clinging around with the public and performing tahleel and all, is there any benefit to the youths? like baby in the garbage?

private.

2010-08-23T23:52:00.003+02:00

i am going to keep my blog private very soon.
so, if you wish to continue reading, do send me your email address.
because as you can probably see, i am sick of people commenting on my blog in the language i don't even know of.

thank you.

offspring.

2010-08-22T18:45:00.004+02:00

When Umar ibn Abdul- Aziz had just been selected to be the new caliph, he told his son, 'I want to rest until 'Asr.' Then his son replied, 'Who guaranteed that a caliph will stay living till Asr?' Umar said, ' Subhanallah who created from my sulbi the one who helps me with my religion.'

Narrated by Abdullah ibn Ziyad ibn Aslam, from his father, from his grandfather, who said: 'When I was accompanying Umar ibn al-Khattab (may Allah be pleased with him) on his patrol of Madeenah night, he felt tired, so he leant against a wall. It was the middle of the night, and (we heard) a woman say to her daughter, 'O my daughter, get up and mix that milk with some water.' The girl said, 'O Mother, did you not hear the decree of Ameer al-Mu'mineen today?' The mother said, 'What was that?'the girl said, 'He ordered someone to announce in a loud voice that milk should not be mixed with water.' The mother said, 'Get up and mix the milk with water; you are in place where Umar cannot see you.' The girl told her mother, 'I cannot obey him in public, and disobey him in private.' Umar heard this, and told me, 'O Aslam, go to that place and see who that girl is, and to whom she was speaking, and wether she has a husband. I came to Umar and told him what I found out. He called his sons together, and said to them: Do any of you need a wife, so I can arrange your marriage with this woman. If I had the desire to get married, I would have been the first one to marry this young woman.' 'Abdullah said: I have a wife.' 'AbdurRahman said: I have a wife' 'Asim said: I do not have a wife, so let me marry her.' So Umar arranged for her to be married to Asim. She gave him a daughter, who grew up to be the mother of Umar ibn Abdul-Aziz.

These are the stories we often were told. I just want people to know the relationship between both.

the ideal muslimah-chapter I (review)

2010-08-14T01:36:00.003+02:00

Muslim Woman and Her Lord.

I've just finished up to she does not travel except with mahram, which is like 9 topics left on this chapter. And frankly, I feel very touched and sorry of what an ignorance I have been all these while. I feel small (well, not literally of course), to be compared to those women who used to pray behind Rasulullah, having verses coming on them to answer their questions. Who am I anyway? Remind me when was the last time I feel very deeply touched like this, that I feel when Sheikh Hatem ever read any verse on mufsiduun, fasiquunn, khaasiriin, terribly sorry of myself. Pathetic I must say.

And of this chapter, in my humble opinion, this is a good chapter to remind us again of what and where our purposes are. It reminds us of how our choices does not count when Allah and Rasulullah has made one for us. I would be happy if someday I can be like Zaynab, when she can boast to the other wives of Prophet, " Your families arranged your marriages, but Allah arranged my marriage from above the seven heavens." And this is very new to me, that now I know Juyubihinna includes face, neck and bosom in the translation of verse 31 surah Nur. And what touched me even more when reading the part how the women of Muhajirin and Ansar used to tore the wall wrapper to cover their head and faces soon after listening to this verse. Again, I asked: who am I anyway?

So as a whole, I feel very well nourished after reading even just some parts of this book. I cannot wait to finish this. But this Ramadhan, I have better book written by the best author to be finished. So have a nice and beneficial Ramadhan everyone. We never know either or not we can meet the next. Those who ever had time to curse the boredom on Ramadhan, are the biggest losers of all.

taraweeh.

2010-08-07T20:38:00.001+03:00

don't talk.

2010-08-03T03:41:00.002+03:00

clear path lies ahead.

Ramadhan.

2010-07-30T23:07:00.002+03:00

the answered.

2010-07-24T03:08:00.002+03:00

In case you ever wonder.

I have been trapped inside denials since ever.

And now that I've found the escape

Why should I cry?

Rejoice young woman

God is taking you out of what you've been struggling to put off

Remember how you did ask to take it away, so none of you are harmed?

Remember how He unearths every truth one by one?

And yet you keep your eyes shut to where the lights shine?

You are a woman, which makes things so typical

That you tend to forgive big things by small nice deeds

So today if you ask me, should you cry, why you do not?

Today is my victory, young man!

what we were taught of.

2010-07-22T22:23:00.001+03:00

I remember when I was plainly a small kid, taught by the teacher: when you get your first menstruation, that means you are an adult. That certainly makes you a big person, that qualifies you to bear the burden of responsibility on your shoulder. So, I remember how disgusting we did look at certain older people while saying towards each other: ehh akak tu tak period lagi ke? Selambe je tak pakai tudung!, or even wearing shorts among the men disgusts us. But slowly when we grow up, we learned to digest things, and thus accepting those behaviors as part of our flesh, that when we walk around, we finally find them harmless.

I found life is very contradicting nowadays. On top of all good deeds the teachers keep teaching at school, something else get in the way.

Remember how we were taught to cover ourselves from the school?

How about the media telling us, through loads of its drama, about it's ok not to cover ourselves, as long as we have pure heart bla3.

Remember how we were taught about obeying our parents?

How about the media telling us that true love stands beyond the obstacles, including our parents' disagreement?

Remember how we were taught that we have to work hard to go to the Paradise?

How about the media telling us, how beautiful it is to gain lots of good things in this world, the money, wives, children, houses, cars, etc..?

Because the teachers at school cannot stay with us forever but the media absolutely do. Which makes us way more comfortable with all the influences. In the end, those good behaviors taught by good people are gone like ashes blown by the wind of medias. Bit by bit that it finally fades away. That we finally cannot discriminate the differences. I certainly hope the disgusts towards those bad deeds remain inside me. Especially when I was about to do them all. May Allah guide us all.

you turn.

2010-07-18T14:14:00.007+03:00

they are human beings. they did make mistakes, they did do things are embarassed of.

of love.

2010-07-15T02:44:00.001+03:00

The day when the sky will become as molten copper,

And the hills become as flakes of wool,

And no familiar friend will ask a question of his friend

Though they will be given sight of them. The guilty man will long to be able to ransom himself from the punishment of that day at the price of his children

And his spouse and his brother

And his kin that harboured him

And all that are in the earth, if then it might deliver him.

But nay! for lo! it is the fire of hell

Eager to roast;

(70: 8-17)

It will be, on the Day they see it, as though they had not remained
[in the world] except for an afternoon or a morning thereof.

(79:46)

is this the world you feel more comfortable of?

Grounded.

2010-07-12T22:24:00.001+03:00

End of second term exam

Day	Date	Subject	Time
Saturday	31/7/2010	Obstetrics, Gynecology ++++	9-12
Tuesday	3/8/2010	Pediatric ++	9-11
Saturday	7/8/2010	Tropical medicine +	9-11
Tuesday	10/8/2010	Orthopedic ++	9-11

Disclaimer: I put more + on subject I least ready for.

I am partly excited to finish my exam, apart from my homecoming, it's Ramadhan waiting right on 11^th/12^th.

Oh my God, I am sooo cannot wait to have I know a short, but yet the best I wish. May this year's give every one of us the best. Oh yes and my flight is gonna be on 20^th.

But on top of all, hello exams, I will smack you down! I mean it.

p/s: I am now trying my best not to listen to ANY song, in which I keep on failing. And I wish Sheikh Mahmoud Al-Masry has a lot more lectures with English subtitles. How pathetic is my Arabic, I know.pfft~

lovelovelove

2010-07-04T11:21:00.003+03:00

this is a post to waste your precious study time.

finally i have found the piece of art i never thought i have. i mean like i always said, if you want something artistic, simply don't look at my hand heh.

i think apart from cake deco, i love home deco.
and i mean deco ONLY.
i don't like eating much of the things i deco,
as much as i don't like doing housekeeping.

so pardon my books on the floor. :D

i want this lady gaga's kitchen. i'm not her fan. i'm her kitchen's fan. :)

إني لأرى مقعدي من الجنة الآن

2010-07-02T18:32:00.003+03:00

إني لأرى مقعدي من الجنة الآن

melted my stony heart,
shown in my cold tears.

Apple Pie (Mc Donald's style)

2010-06-30T14:47:00.003+03:00

seriously malas nk jawab soalan oral ngan ym.

Filling

1/2 kg apple-chopped
3 tbs sugar
5tbs flour
1tbs cinnamon powder

Pastry

1/2 kg flour
1tbs salt
2 tbs sugar
water
1 cup oil (heated)

mix all the filling, set aside
put flour in a bowl, add sugar and salt
heat the oil add to the flour
mix them till you find the flour fragile
pour the water while kneading, start with half a cup. if you need more, add.
divide the dough into 5
roll it using the rolling pin till thin enough (like 0.5cm)
cut the rolled dough into 4/6 depends on you
put the filling, wrap it using the dough, clamp each side, put onto a plate
keep in the fridge
after like one hour, bring it out
heat the oil, make sure it is hot enough, but use small heat.
dip the pie inside water, and quickly put into the oil.
do not attempt to move the pies until they are brown enough
when you see the golden brown colour, remove them from the oil.

p/s:as usual, if yours cannot taste like mine, so sorry.haha. because i don't measure the ingredients while cooking lol.

engagement.

2010-06-28T21:45:00.005+03:00

Engagement according to sharee’ah means that the man asks the woman to marry him. The view of the scholars is that engagement is prescribed for one who wants to get married. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And there is no sin on you if you make a hint of betrothal…”

[al-Baqarah 2:235]

and it was narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) got engaged to ‘Aa’ishah. (Al-Bukhaari, al-Nikaah, 4793). And in al-Saheeh it also states that the Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) got engaged to Hafsah. (Al-Bukhaari, al-Nikaah, 4830).

The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) encouraged the one who wants to get engaged to look at the woman to whom he wishes to propose. According to the hadeeth, “When any one of you proposes marriage to a woman, if he can look at that which will encourage him to go ahead and marry her, then let him do so.” (Abu Dawood, al-Nikaah, 2082; classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh Abi Dawood, 1832).

But in Islamic sharee’ah there are no specific practices that must be followed with regard to engagement. What some Muslims do, announcing the engagement, having a party to celebrate and exchanging gifts, all comes under the heading of customs which are permissible in principle, and none of them are haraam except those which sharee’ah indicates are haraam – which includes the exchange of rings between the engaged couple, a custom which is known in Arabic as “dublah.” This custom goes against sharee’ah for the following reasons:

1 – Some people think that these rings increase the love between the spouses and have an effect on their relationship. This is an ignorant (jaahili) belief and is an attachment to something for which there is no basis in sharee’ah and which does not make sense.

2 – This custom involves imitating the non-Muslims such as Christians and others. It is not a Muslim custom at all. The Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) warned us against that when he said, “You will inevitably follow the paths of those who came before you, handspan by handspan, cubit by cubit, until even if they entered the hole of a lizard, you will follow them.” We said, “O Messenger of Allaah, (do you mean) the Jews and Christians?” He said, “Who else?” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, al-I’tisaam bi’l-Kitaab wa’l-Sunnah, 6889; Muslim, al-‘Ilm, 6723).

And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever imitates a people is one of them.” (Narrated by Abu Dawood, al-Libaas, 4031; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Abi Dawood, 3401).

3 – This engagement usually takes place before the ‘aqd (marriage contract), in which case it is not permissible for the man to put the ring on his fiancée’s hand himself, because she is still a stranger (non-mahram) to him, and has not yet become his wife.

Finally, we will quote the words of Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him) on this matter:

“ ‘Dublah’ is a word that refers to the engagement ring. In principle there is nothing wrong with rings (i.e., they are permissible), unless they are accompanied by certain beliefs, as some people do when the man writes his name on the ring that he gives to his fiancée, and the woman writes her name on the ring that she gives to her fiancé, believing that this will guarantee the bonds between the spouses. In this case this ‘dublah’ or engagement ring is haraam, because it represents an attachment to something for which there is no basis in sharee’ah and which does not make sense. Similarly it is not permissible for the man to put the ring on the woman’s hand himself, because she is not yet his wife, so she is still a stranger (i.e., non-mahram) to him; she is not his wife until after the marriage contract is done.”

Al-Fataawa al-Jaami’ah li’l-Mar’ah al-Muslimah, 3/914. (source)

As for a fiancée, before the marriage contract is done, the fiancé does not have the right to speak words of affection to his fiancée, or to hold her hand, because he is still a “stranger” (non-mahram) to her and is like any other non-mahram man. No one should take this matter lightly, and it makes no difference if the fiancée is a Muslim or a Christian. (source)

i read people ask about what is the difference between engagement and being in a relationship. in whichever condition, i think the only difference is that when you get engaged, this procedure involves a man coming to the guardian rather than going straight away to the female. that's the way taught by sunnah. btw, marriage is said to be a way of completing part of the religion, and thus, i believe it shall not get started with anything forbidden.

paranoia

2010-06-18T13:05:00.004+03:00

A: nape u tak bagi buat any religious event dekat dalam kawasan u hah?
B: biaselaahh mesir kan mcm paranoid sket dgn gerakan2 agama ni
A: apesal plak?
B: kalau kau jadi pemimpin pastu kau amek hak rakyat, kau selalu je nk paranoid takut org gulingkan kau. unless laa kau pemimpin yang adil ikut agama semua, kau tak kesah pun kalau orang nak gulingkan kau.
A: hurmm
B: cube tengok orang-orang salah, semua paranoid. israel.
A: kan? kapal hantar bantuan pun paranoid.
B: haa kan. kau tengok orang couple, kalau orang ternampak, mulalah paranoid tak tentu hala. cakap, nanti habeslaa dia cerita kat orang semua. padahal orang yang nampak tu kesah ape?
A: haha.

(perbualan sebenar setelah alter here and there.haha)

p/s: accusing me for being anyone's girlfriend is a very big insult. accusing me for hanging out with a man is another insult. if you don't mind, i do!

2 weeks.

2010-06-16T14:27:00.002+03:00

i have just realized i have lose much of my respect towards a bunch of people in this period of time.
i have reason for not wanting to go to the class.
and do i have to write things everywhere so everyone knows every single part of my life?

get a life!

don't you worry there my honey.

2010-06-14T22:24:00.003+03:00

give it a shot
seriously i don't mind
i guess.

~~p/s: i still think you are a catch until today finally comes.~~

retard.

2010-06-11T01:07:00.002+03:00

i have something i would like to voice out:

can i get a baby by birthing them without any procedure involving a man?
because i don't feel like getting married
but i feel like having a child

refer to the title,
i know.

temp.

2010-06-10T17:03:00.004+03:00

this is life
there are attempts to be failed
battles to be lose

this is life
there are sicks waiting for death
there are living waiting for sentences

this is life
there are days when the sun shines
but there are days when storm strikes
and yet nothing is left to be hold onto

this is life
it breaks your heart
but you choose
either or not
it'll let you break your smile

this is life
where we will only have one live to be lived
and it is very temporary.

The pregnant man OMG!

2010-06-07T23:39:00.002+03:00

Watch video here

Read info here

So, is this permitted in Islam?

people.

2010-05-30T22:16:00.002+03:00

eventhough i don't have many good memories with you
but surely you have your own footprints
on my icy cold heart
and when you are gone
surely it hurts
eventhough others cannot possibly see it

life is not an open book anyway, yes?

Death is enough as a reminder.

sisterhood.

2010-05-27T01:03:00.004+03:00

get along girls!

i am luna :)

looks like somebody needs extra attention tonight

so?

2010-05-21T13:44:00.004+03:00

learn a lesson?

people talk
why bother listening?

people hurt
why bother feeling?

people lie
why bother believing?

people devastate
why bother hoping?

people show
why bother looking?

so if you think that you have found the right ones
go through this equation again and again
because they are just one of those people
they can barely change
whatever in their chromosomes.

p/s: so what if i am a sexist? care to change your gender then?

quick random post.

2010-05-13T22:46:00.002+03:00

of results
i honestly did not reach the target i have put on myself. but considering the fact that the exam was hard, and this is just the beginning of clinical years, that i was just trying to adapt to the new condition, i feel satisfied A BIT. but HEY, WORK HARDER!

of becoming exam
really i wish i never did waste that much of time.

of something else
how nice it is to mother someone? ignore me. i just feel jealous of someone's pregnancy haha.

of friends
i can always stay inside your sorrows and joyous. lemme know if i can by any chance be helpful. :)

سبحانك لا علم لنا إلا ما علّمتنا إنك أنت العليم الحكيم

of exam.

2010-05-10T18:36:00.000+03:00

i am so not ready.
pfft~

burden

2010-04-27T11:46:00.002+02:00

we had a down syndrome patient yesterday. at the end of the class, after the patient had left, the professor said:

he is the burden to his family. and community

in which i disagree. i don't know have i been just too emotional or what but i think we are all burden to our family and community. if feeding, education, and expenses are what determining the burden, i seriously think that we, the normal unmutated 46 XX/XY are more burdening. who wants to be fed to more delicious food? who wants to wear the branded clothes? who have desire to have big houses, latest cars, beautiful wives? us or those infertile, not-so-clever down syndromes?

down syndrome are all trainable, but only few are educable. i have heard of lots of centers in malaysia training these down syndrome patients. it's just that people have to put more efforts and more time on that.

i mean like, nobody wants to have a down syndrome child. but who are us to question the higher power then? we are not tested on things we cannot get through by the way. down syndrome children may not give their guardian much luxury. at least not in this world. but in the next infinity life, they are what presenting the parents with mounts of gold insya Allah.

i cannot get it

2010-04-16T19:30:00.004+02:00

if a man cannot make you a priority
stop making them yours.

and making a woman a priority
obviously is not a rational man's behavior.

when he goes beyond the 'too much' line
why bother giving a chance
and heck live within denial?

love is blind
you obviously are not.

take it or leave it
i won't mind.

p/s: and yes i don't like listening to people's relationship's problem. and why in the world have i been updating my blog three days in a row? still sane?

sila jangan baca :p

2010-04-15T13:18:00.004+02:00

saya ada kawan-kawan yang bila makan mintak resepi. pastu suruh ambil pen ngan kertas orang nak tulis, taknak pulak. nampak sangat mintak resepi sbb nk konon2 buat je.padahaaalll (sila terasa haha).

dah macam makcik dah aku rasa tulis2 resepi kat blog ni. lantaklaaah.

Rojak:

cucur:

tepung
bawang besar (bole blend ngan ikan bilis atau bole racik2)
daun sup
ikan bilis/udang kering
kunyit serbuk sesudu
minyak sesudu

-bancuh pekat sket
-goreng (selalu aku goreng macam xde bentuk bulat2 pon. aku buat sekali besar.nnt dah sejuk potong2.orang malas biaselaahh :p)

kuah:
kacang tanah 1/4 kilo ok kot
biskut merry satu yg kecik tu cukup rasenye (blend dgn air dlm secawan)
cili kering
bawang besar 1 biji
bawang putih 3 ulas
ikan bilis/udang kering segenggam
gula merah setengah peket (klu xde xpayah je pakai gula biasa agak2 manis)
garam

-kacang tanah blend (klu beli yang kt kedai kacang tu xyah gorenglaa klu kacang tanah mentah mcm kt msia tu gorenglaa dulu)
-bawang besar+bawang+ikan bilis + cili kering blend
-tumis bawang ngan cili kering smpi naik minyak
-masuk gula merah
-masuk kacang dgn air, agak2 smpi mcm kuah kacang
-masuk biskut merry yang dah blend
-masuk garam
-kacau, tunggu smpi agak2 pekat
-kecikkan api, tunggu dlm 5 minit dah siap.

klu kurang garam ke gula, tambahlaa lg.hehe. pastu air jgn letak byk sgt klu biskut merry ko sikit. nnt de x pekat.

aku copy paste je dr message board fb. alang2 dah tulis, masukkan je dlm blog. pasni sape gedik2 tanye cane nk buat cucur laa bagai, aku sekeh dia :p

p/s:lasagna leyl mane? x muncul2 pon :p

in relationships

2010-04-13T19:00:00.005+02:00

be pessimist!

if you are in hurry and someone asks you for help, and you did. don't expect them to do the same to you next time.
if you have very little money, and you have a starving someone next to you and you are hungry as much, but you did gave your money to them. don't expect them to do the same.
if you prepared a grand party for someone on their big day. don't expect them to do the same.
if you are already in the toilet and already took off your clothes, and someone knocked the door saying they have some urgency and you are already late for school, but you did allow them to go first. don't expect them to do the same.
if you willingly prepare food for someone when they said they are hungry despite the exam you have tomorrow morning. don't expect them to do the same.
if you wholeheartedly giving everything for someone, don't expect them to do the same.
if you would understand if someone is submitting their assignment very late that you have to skip the class the next morning, don't expect them to do the same.
if you love someone that much, don't expect them to do the same.

because the hope and the feeling of begging for return is what silently break a heart, and killing the love inside of you. brotherhood starts from the lowest level of open-hearted and the highest of making others the priority rather than ours.

... من مات يوم الجمعة

2010-04-03T20:59:00.004+02:00

i've been wandering around few blogs when i found this:

Rasulullah SAW ada bersabda, maksudnya:

“Sesiapa yang meninggal dunia pada hari Jumaat atau malamnya, diangkatlah daripadanya akan azab kubur.”

Sabda Rasulullah SAW dalam riwayat yang lain, maksudnya:

“Sesiapa yang meninggal dunia pada hari Jumaat atau malamnya, nescaya dituliskan oleh Allah baginya pahala syahid, dipelihara daripada seksa kubur, dengan syarat dia beriman.”

so i went through dorar el-sunniyah and really seek for the level of this hadeeth.

then i found these:

1 - من مات يوم الجمعة أو ليلة الجمعة أجير من عذاب القبر ، وجاء يوم القيامة عليه طابع الشهداء

الراوي: جابر بن عبدالله الأنصاري المحدث: أبو نعيم - المصدر: حلية الأولياء - الصفحة أو الرقم: 3/181
خلاصة حكم المحدث: غريب من حديث جابر ومحمد تفرد به عمر بن موسى وهو مدني فيه لين

2 - من مات يوم الجمعة وقي عذاب القبر

الراوي: أنس بن مالك المحدث: ابن القيسراني - المصدر: ذخيرة الحفاظ - الصفحة أو الرقم: 4/2414
خلاصة حكم المحدث: [فيه] واقد بن سلامة قال البخاري : لا يصح حديثه

3 - من مات يوم الجمعة أو ليلتها غفر له

الراوي: عبدالله بن عمرو بن العاص المحدث: الذهبي - المصدر: ميزان الاعتدال - الصفحة أو الرقم: 4/299
خلاصة حكم المحدث: منكر

4 - من مات يوم الجمعة كتب له أجر شهيد ووقي فتنة القبر

الراوي: - المحدث: الزيلعي - المصدر: تخريج الكشاف - الصفحة أو الرقم: 4/19
خلاصة حكم المحدث: غريب بهذا اللفظ

5 - من مات يوم الجمعة وقي عذاب القبر

الراوي: أنس بن مالك المحدث: الهيثمي - المصدر: مجمع الزوائد - الصفحة أو الرقم: 2/322
خلاصة حكم المحدث: فيه يزيد الرقاشي وفيه كلام

6 - من مات يوم الجمعة كتب له أجر شهيد ووقي فتنة القبر

الراوي: عبدالله بن عمرو بن العاص المحدث: ابن حجر العسقلاني - المصدر: الكافي الشاف - الصفحة أو الرقم: 290
خلاصة حكم المحدث: [روي من طرق]

7 - من مات يوم الجمعة كتب له أجر شهيد ووقي فتنة القبر

الراوي: عبدالله بن عمرو بن العاص المحدث: السخاوي - المصدر: المقاصد الحسنة - الصفحة أو الرقم: 502
خلاصة حكم المحدث: [له طرق]

8 - من مات يوم الجمعة أو ليلة الجمعة وقي فتنة القبر وكتب شهيدا

الراوي: محمد بن شهاب الزهري المحدث: محمد بن محمد الغزي - المصدر: إتقان ما يحسن - الصفحة أو الرقم: 2/632
خلاصة حكم المحدث: مرسل

9 - من مات يوم الجمعة كتب الله له أجر شهيد

الراوي: إياس بن بكر المحدث: الشوكاني - المصدر: الفتح الرباني - الصفحة أو الرقم: 10/4962
خلاصة حكم المحدث: من مرسل إياس بن بكر مرفوعا

10 - من مات يوم الجمعة أو ليلة الجمعة وقي فتنة القبر

الراوي: عبدالله بن عمرو بن العاص المحدث: أحمد شاكر - المصدر: مسند أحمد - الصفحة أو الرقم: 10/133
خلاصة حكم المحدث: إسناده ضعيف [وقد تراجع الشيخ أحمد شاكر عن تضعيفه وصحح إسناده في 12/13]

11 - من مات يوم الجمعة أو ليلة الجمعة وقي فتنة القبر

الراوي: عبدالله بن عمرو بن العاص المحدث: أحمد شاكر - المصدر: مسند أحمد - الصفحة أو الرقم: 12/13
خلاصة حكم المحدث: إسناده صحيح

there's only one sanad sahih, and one sanad sahih after revision, others are wondered, accepted after few exceptions and da'if (weak). so?

in whichever day we are dead on, doesn't matter. it's how we live on the other days that count.

perhaps privacy?

2010-03-31T00:31:00.003+02:00

i wanna wake up alone
without any access to the outside
i wanna stay unspoken
without any signs understood
i wanna get out of the crowds
without ever being noticed
i wanna go unidentified
without ever being caught

loner you call
peace says i

i wanna find the darkest place
and stay inside
alone of course
and ignored

because i afraid of the despairs
because i afraid of hurting
because i certainly cannot tolerate losing

have i gone mad
or the world is changing?

fill me up!

2010-03-28T01:36:00.004+02:00

please come out baby, please.

meet the lazy nancy.

a good ear will do.

2010-03-22T23:13:00.004+02:00

i sighed my medicine rounds, i cherished my surgery days, so what says i in my obgyn rounds?

so far, i shall say, well good. i have enough encouragement to keep coming to classes, not by dragging, but partially running while the time is nowhere close to rush. i secretly love obgyn (well i think it's obvious). i love how the doctors still care sparing some sense of humor, i love my blood suddenly gush into my face. i love all the palpitations hearing those screamings (eventhough if i have a choice i would seal their mouth out or paralized their vocal cords, so i don't have to feel those tense looking at my own frowns).

first time was a bit shocking. they always are. i managed to take half an hour to calm myself to stay on the positive side and telling myself secretly, "come on paan, they are just exaggerating." well who says giving birth is painless? unless of course we chose c-section, which is if it was me would be the last choice on earth i would chose. and it takes another 15 minutes to convince myself that i, no matter how have to stand strong and learn to put my hands in and pull the baby out. we have received our 10 deliveries records' task. and yes, i am excited about starting.

my doctor today (i think he is going to be my favourite :) ), ask us:

why do women feel the morning sickness the most tense during her first pregnancy?

guess what? it was just psychological. because they worry harder and feel more excited about the pregnancy. and that's what putting them into such disastrous condition. women with one child, they tend to get busy with the first child and therefore, are having less time to worry about her current pregnancy.

i am so into obgyn, well at least so far. and hopefully far enough at least till exams do us apart.haha.

p/s: water-birth, please.

you!

2010-03-05T13:48:00.001+02:00

stop being pessimist

really stop!

إنا الانسان خلق هلوعا

building a family

2010-03-03T18:09:00.007+02:00

is not as simple as falling in love (or is it lust?)

don't get married because of trend

don't get married because others do

don't take a spouse because you are desperate to have one

don't take a spouse just because you are the only one who doesn't have one

good things take time, ain't it?

and besides, women are not dying because she is unmarried, or the other way around

love (or lust?) is blind, humans are not.

getting married is like going to the war. are we weaponized enough?

who can bear these pain here, here and here?

i can't. i cannot tolerate children's violation.

p/s: related link:
1) http://islamqa.com/en/ref/89709/marriage
2) http://islamqa.com/en/ref/89709/marriage
3)http://islamqa.com/en/ref/106288/marriage

either win or die trying

2010-02-21T10:42:00.001+02:00

no joke, man.

p/s: fb dah meninggal dunia. sebab tuan dia nak exam.nanti summer kita jumpa lagi. :p

even eagles need a push.

2010-02-15T00:27:00.003+02:00

no, i have not finished my readings yet. academic and pleasure.

life is a school
and you were born special
because you bear the burdens on your shoulder
and you gather all the strength
to stand up again
after pushed down
because you don't blame the ruthless world
and stop considering yourself a victim
after failures
and that's just enough
to rise an atypical human inside you

You are never given a wish, without also being given the power to make it true.

Anyone who hasn't had a failure is an amateur.

what is holiday?

2010-02-05T12:06:00.004+02:00

since i have proven myself a useless one all these internal medicine course, this is the price i have to pay. after all.

Your job is to learn as much as possible. Think of yourself as a sponge. Soak it all in. Take responsibility for your learning. Seek out learning opportunities whenever possible. You will never get this opportunity again.

taken from here

we seldom realize

2010-01-29T19:33:00.004+02:00

we seldom realize
in the middle of our pains
there are periods of relieved
we seldom appreciate

we seldom realize
in the middle of chaos
there are periods for a-sip-of-coffee
we seldom seize

we seldom realize
in the middle of poverty
there are periods of prosperity
we seldom cherish

we seldom realize
in the middle of loneliness
there are periods of togetherness
we seldom notice

we said we are in pain
we said we are poor
we said we are tired
we said we are alone

does our pain a terminal stage malignancy?
or our poverty the homeless ones?
or our chaotic days the insomnic ones?
or our lonesome the stuck-in-a mirrored-wall-room-alone ones?

we seldom realize
there are thousands who care
because we barely care of them

we seldom realize
the thousands that cherish
because we barely appreciate them

you see
you might make someone a priority
up to the point
you can turn to blindness

you see
you might make something your everything
up to the point
you really turn to nothing

you see
it's never too late
to love the thousands who love
rather than one who doesn't

you see
growing old is another turning point
we seldom realize.

p/s: i mean every clarification i have barely written.

i think of you.i seriously do.

2010-01-23T21:23:00.002+02:00

i have a complicated diabetic patient today. well, that didn't really touch my nerves. so THEY took the history of course (did i mention i was like dragging my feet all of these while to my clinical rounds?), which also didn't touch my nerves at all. few minutes later, another daughter of my patient came. arguing with the other daughter, like very loud one. saying the mother should not be there. that there was no doctor, that we were just students, that we are not egyptian, that it is useless to talk to us, the different tongues. then the doctor came when she was about to move her mother out. again, whe was arguing with the doctor, in which she lost and has to let her mother stays with us. few minutes before our lesson ended, the son of this patient came. arguing with the doctor again. this time the doctor lost.

being in the student's chair, i might say, these children are annoying. but, i barely say they are annoying, except from the part that the son really yelled at the doctor.

___________________________________________________________

umi: hari-hari doktor tu datang kejut nenek. dia tolak kuat-kuat, panggil, "makcik kamariah! makcik kamariah! buka mata!"
me: dia nak kejut kot, takut koma ke ape.
umi: yelahh. tak payah laah kuat-kuat sangat macam tu. panas hati jugak anak-anak ni tengok.

i miss you now. i do!

can i have it untitled?

2010-01-19T20:42:00.007+02:00

i feel like writing the long nags of mine. who knows they can turn to be journals.hehe.

the worst thing about being a hard stone is when it comes to things where you mutter a NO at the first time, and knowing you have, no matter how, to take them. when i really feel like crying hard in front of all these internal medicine things, i would appreciate less pressure from anybody else (if just you know what i mean).

OSCE went worst. even worse than surgery's. among 3 of the topics i have to study, of course, the least expected and the least wanted has to come to me. both cases. i was a disaster i might say.

you know it reminds me on the old days. being one of the SBP's perfect-scorer, standing proudly in the middle of XY's names, knowing that i am all stable physically and mathematically, nobody would expect me to refuse filling any engineering applications. moreover from the biggest sponsor of it. and nobody would ever expect me to not even want to fulfill them. i hate making choices. i hate to say no when it comes in front of my eyes. it shakes my ego, and of course my stand. so i refused ANY engineering applications, and i was gambling my future, when i delicately still stepping into medicine.

i was just like coming from the other side of the world when i first stepped into medicine. i honestly, never stayed up, unless somebody asked me to teach them maths, or i purposely think i should at least win an A2 for my history. never for anything else. if you were one of my schoolmate, then i shouldn't be elaborate more. and yes medicine was at first killing me. i was like, what? all these terms? all these words? which of course you don't memorize physics, because you don't answer those hydraulics and log questions based on what is written in the textbooks, but on what you certainly understand. same goes with add maths. it means like, if you keep focusing well in class, you don't have to even open up any books at home. believe me, i never did finish my add maths home works. most of the time are because there were never punishments for not finishing them. haha. so really medicine asked me to keep still on my desk. like read these freaking books, unless you wish to return early in the summer. oh my, how am i gonna do this?

so theoretically, 3 years have passed, thankfully. and with loads of hard works and tears too i might say. i went to surgery which was my first posting, which i at first thought would be a disaster, but it turns out to be not but a bliss even. and here, now while typing this, i feel like i am in a morgue. i have to go through dull days, counting everyday to pass quickly and just so that you can at least get rid of it. you know, being a person of if-i-don't-like-you-i-won't-be-liking-you-forever is a silent murderer of mine. i can sit in front of bailey and love, and not moving anywhere for few pages, but i can't help myself focus on these kumar and clark's for even an hour without having any other distractions, whether is made or i am making them for myself, which is frustrating enough.

OSCE costs me 40 marks, which i believe i am not losing all of them. i have to keep being an optimist i know. hopefully i will. somebody told me, indirectly, agama memberikan asas yang kukuh untuk seseorang itu kekal optimis. i wish i have a strong base, enough to support my failing axial.

of course.

2010-01-12T01:21:00.003+02:00

not everyone who laughs along with you are actually laughing

you never learn to know real things
until you learn the history.

and sorry, that would be our last conversation
obviously.

loof

2010-01-09T17:47:00.001+02:00

untuk apa melayan kebodohan dengan kebodohan?

here

kau. (revisited)

2010-01-07T13:55:00.000+02:00

Kau angau!
Kau tahu?
Kau pun senyum.
Memang.

Kau gila?
Dah lupa dulu?
Kau senyap.
Takut.

Tapi dia lain.
Dia tak tahu.
Tapi dia dah agak.
Tapi dia rasa dia perasan saja.
Tapi kau angau!

Kau tak takut menangis lagi?
Kau cakap kau tak akan.
Bukan sebab dia takkan buat.
Tapi sebab kau akan kuat.

Kau takkan beritahu dia?
Tidak.
Allah tau apa yang kau dan dia tak tahu.
Yang kau lahirkan dan yang kau sembunyikan.

Kalau dia pilih orang lain?
Kau tak sedih?
Tak.
Kalau dia angau juga?
Biarlah.
Kau tak mahu dia suka kau?
Tak.

Kau mahu dia suka agama kau.
Sebab kau kata kau suka agama dia.
Dan kau nak bantu agama dia.
Dan kau mahu dia bantu agama kau.

Jadi sekarang kau angau
Adakah kau membantu agama dia?
Atau sekurang-kurangnya agama engkau sendiri?
Kau diam.
Lama.

20:54
02052009

p/s:membantu agama (read: membantu urusan agama).

Contoh membantu dalam urusan agama:

Ketika Khalifah Umar Abdul Aziz baru dilantik sebagai khalifah, beliau berkata kepada anaknya," Sesungguhnya aku mahu berehat sehingga Asar." Lalu anak beliau berkata," Siapakah yang menjamin bahawa khalifah akan terus bernyawa sehingga Asar?" Umar lantas bangun dan menyiapkan hal-hal pentadbiran dan berkata,"Maha Suci Allah yang menciptakan dari sulbiku (read:tulang sulbi) mereka yang membantu aku dalam urusan agamaku."

eurotrip guidance.

2010-01-06T11:57:00.003+02:00

since i am tired of answering phone calls and similar questions most of the time.

this is a link to the eurorail website. they have maps as well. and most of the time we tend to get to the 2nd class train. because we used the pass. since we are going to use the train more frequent than other transport, so a pass is really a worth it choice.
my advice is if you are going to stay in a place for more than 3 days, better seek for an appartment, otherwise hostels should be a better choice. try to get ones with breakfast included so that you won't have to starve all day long if you are not a big fan of these kebab things.this is where you find the net very useful. few links.here, here, and here.
i bought my pass at Gare Du Nord's station, Paris.
not including ticket, i spent 1000 euros for 3 countries' tour. others might be saving more.
1 day at disneyland is never enough.
Wear PVC sport shoes. This is winter. You will feel numbness very often. On chin and toes.
urm..urm..

that's all.

we are all loners

2009-12-25T23:24:00.008+02:00

at the end.

40
39
20
12
1
look at how time has ripped us apart
bits by bits
till the very end
we are all alone
sailing our own boat.

Happy New Hijri Year people
may we become even more wiser and rational sailors.
:)

XY episodes back to back

2009-12-16T17:30:00.005+02:00

ok xde kaitan pun

hari tu kan masa summer ade daurah ustaz ni kan. dalam banyak2 benda dia ckp, ada satu benda ni yang sebenarnya buat saya paling tak puas hati. it pushes my ego i guess. dia cakap," orang perempuan ni memang emosional. pening kepala pun nak letak kt status ym." emosional part is accepted, undoubtedly. tapi part pening kepala pun nak letak tu, saya rasa macam, "hellooo, i beg your pardon?"

so being a typical me, i went to check on my messenger list. what do people write, especially man. are they really that rational? and apparently, they are not. at all. i really find these men who do not put anything on their status other than academic or religious issues or motivational words are much of a very good example for a rationality. i mean, it proves his theory then. but when some are putting like jiwang's stuffs, unnecessary complaints-hey are you sure you are a man? sorry, this is me. don't go beyond this line if you ever get started with any gag reflex.

since i have not been putting any of status telling people my pening kepala and sakit perut things, i have been considering the fact-am i becoming more rational and less emotional than you men? may be hyperandrogenism. who knows then.

this is just a post full of complaints. well, your messenger is yours then. and whenever i feel like not liking people's status or whatever, i might as well remove them without notice off of my messenger list. same goes with you guys.

can we?

2009-12-07T02:03:00.008+02:00

i know i am supposed to finish my reading now but i can't help this. seriously.

i posted a status in my facebook few days ago:

mereka yang kamu cintai di dunia mungkin akan menjadi mereka yang kamu benci di akhirat.

well, i brought up many queries (and some said i was harsh) that people may think i mean like this is directed towards opposite sex or like whatever they might think. but purposely i wrote this status for my burden of frustrations of loads of loved ones in my life, not necessarily a man.

you see, you might love your friends (or bf/gf) now. because you share the same interests, that they are so-called understand you, that they can tolerate loads of things with you, that they can do this and this and this for you, that they love you too, obviously. until it comes to one point: religion. they won't mind if you walk out the door unveiled, wearing shorts. they even are the best company to share your shorts with or they even have been your hair stylist. and those points of similarities brought up so-called understanding for both (or many) of you which act more like a chain to tie the love up.

stop at this point and let us revise where are we in the end are going to be sent to? is this life an eternal life? is tomorrow, by any chance still ever exist? is this the last breathe, or could there be more? is there any afterlife? what is the ratio of life we are in to the life we are going to be in?

those friends of yours, whom you had shared much of so-called love and interests with, is a friend of today.
look at this:

فَإِذَا جَآءَتِ الصَّآخَّةُ - يَوْمَ يَفِرُّ الْمَرْءُ مِنْ أَخِيهِ - وَأُمِّهِ وَأَبِيهِ - وَصَـحِبَتِهُ وَبَنِيهِ - لِكُلِّ امْرِىءٍ مِّنْهُمْ يَوْمَئِذٍ شَأْنٌ يُغْنِيهِ - وُجُوهٌ يَوْمَئِذٍ مُّسْفِرَةٌ - ضَـحِكَةٌ مُّسْتَبْشِرَةٌ - وَوُجُوهٌ يَوْمَئِذٍ عَلَيْهَا غَبَرَةٌ - تَرْهَقُهَا قَتَرَةٌ - أُوْلَـئِكَ هُمُ الْكَفَرَةُ الْفَجَرَةُ

(33. Then when there comes As-Sakhkhah) (34. That Day shall a man flee from his brother.) (35. And from his mother and his father.) (36. And from his wife and his children.) (37. Every man that Day will have enough to make him careless of others.) (38. Some faces that Day will be bright,) (39. Laughing, rejoicing at good news.) (40. And other faces that Day will be dust-stained.) (41. Darkness will cover them.) (42. Such will be the disbelieving, the wicked evil doers.)

and this:

الاٌّخِلاَءُ يَوْمَئِذٍ بَعْضُهُمْ لِبَعْضٍ عَدُوٌّ إِلاَّ الْمُتَّقِينَ
(Friends on that Day will be foes one to another except those who have Taqwa.)

which means those friends we used to have the 'same interests' would be risen to be our foes, and we both will keep on blaming each other: why haven't you remind me on the old days? mind you, it's a BIG day.everyone only cares about themselves. it's the day of selfishness. can we bear it? can we, can we?

so i say like, i don't hate you people who went from veiled to unveiled. from not wearing shorts to a shorts-lover. but, i would be rather frustrated, and my sense of frustrations are always a withdrawal. no offense. no.

There are people you least expected to turn to leaving religious lifestyle. But they do at the end. And the most frightening part is to know that they have never had an intention to return. And absolutely it is a heart-breaking point. Definitely. I have had loads of of friends who turned into that.

I love you for the religion that you have, once you step out of it, my love fades.
-Imam Nawawi-

so, what is the point of making love for these 50 years of remaining life we have, to know that we are going to make hatred in the infinity of life?

now, listen!

2009-12-02T22:26:00.004+02:00

love is blind
humans are not
at least not all of them
NOT ME!

[الاٌّخِلاَءُ يَوْمَئِذٍ بَعْضُهُمْ لِبَعْضٍ عَدُوٌّ إِلاَّ الْمُتَّقِينَ ]
(Friends on that Day will be foes one to another except those who have Taqwa.)

chin up!

2009-11-18T23:42:00.004+02:00

there are days
when you walk down the streets
feeling like a dirt
every eyes you catch
feels more unfriendly
and insulting

there are days
when you walk down the streets
feeling loser
helpless nearly hopeless
every hearts you give
are returned
either in pieces or ashes

there are days
when you walk down the streets
like a dead meat
that you nearly curse your own life
like life itself is a burden
you wish have been thrown anywhere unknown

there are days
when you walk down the streets
in the rain
without the brain
alone and in pain

there are days
when you have them all

today is not the day

today is a brand new day
today is a day of remembrance
that you were once
walking to those streets
and they remain the witnesses

today is the day
to turn at the streets you have passed
and the bruises that is left

today is the day
to tell them all
that you have had
the heart that is alive
the pain that is cured
the match that is won
the dirt that is cleaned

today is the day
to be grateful
that those days had gone
what is left is now left

today is the day
chin up and smile
head up to the end

today is the day.

untitled kot.

2009-11-13T22:20:00.006+02:00

thumbs up!
to be continued is devastating though.

~~angau bole?~~
:p

kau lagi.

2009-11-08T17:39:00.002+02:00

it's not gonna work.
go go go
AWAY!

sorry.

random rips.

2009-11-03T10:46:00.004+02:00

i am currently skipping my lecture unintendedly (?). dah smpi rumah dah cabut baju, org mesej lecture ade what the hell aku ade 5 minutes to go.so lets give up.

of surgery department
well sometimes it became rather frustrating when things went rather unorganized.and it turns to be more devastating the only partition who are striving hard to make things better is just an unheard voice.spoken but unheard.i mean spoken not muttering. so every time our surgeon from head and neck department asked us, is there anything that makes you rather inconvenience during your stay, it is a big hesitant to us to answer. because most of the time it is not head and neck that make things hard. it's the surgery department. like when it comes to head and neck's turn, we planned things well, being rather anxious what would happen on the next day, loads of phone calls made, interrupting the co-ordinator's conference. but today when it comes to other department?haih. (please don't take heart, i mean like i don't blame the students, but rather the admins).

and yes i love being in the OT. i love glancing at everything. i won't sit down when my back ache, i am training my back.i don't wanna be a surgeon.i can't afford concentrating on thing for hours. but yes, i love OT. and by OT i mean both surgery and anaesthesia.

of the hustle bustle
please stay.i love my life this way.

of winter
i wish there will be snow. sadly i know there won't.

of dinner
i have changed my mind. i dunno why i feel rather reluctant to grab a dress and put on my head. to even walk out the door. sorry.

of the double-decker bus
what the hell it takes LE3 from gami' ibrahim to shatby? not worth it not worth it.